Look What LOVE Has Done

Love.  

What comes to mind when you say "love".  I mean, in our house, we love pizza, cookie dough and the Packers but I also love God, my husband and my kids. The word "love" has a broad spectrum in the ways it is used.  But there is a great Love that out measures them all.

I've said before that our adoption of Endale changed our family.  For me personally, it changed me in so many different ways.  The one thing that stands out far above all the blessings and growth from bringing Endale home is my view of love.  Not just any love, but God's love for me.  I grew up as a Pastor's Kid.  My parents tell the story of me being born on a Wednesday and in church the very next Sunday.  So I have known of God's love for me and have loved God from a very early age.  I never really knew any different.  I may never truly understand God's love for me this side of Heaven, but after experiencing adoption I grasp God's love for me better than I ever have before.

It wasn't until our adoption process and then homecoming of Endale that I "got it".  God's love for me.  You see, earthly relationships can skew our perception of what love is supposed to be.   The earthly relationships that we have are imperfect.  Do you have a relationship with someone who has conditions or boundaries?  Do you have a relationship with someone who doesn't show grace and mercy?  Is there a relationship where there is no forgiveness?  Do you have a person in your life that says they love you, but they don't pursue a true relationship with you?

If you're like me, you fall into all or at least one of those in your relationships.  The struggle of trying so hard to have a relationship with someone who doesn't want it.  In the end, you wind up hurt and confused. We spend so much time and energy trying to earn or even keep love.  God's love isn't like that.

Adoption is the perfect earthly picture of God's love for us.  Our adoption story went something like this.  When we started the process of adopting (all three), we studied everything we could find out about them, their birth country, their pictures.  We wanted to know them.  We knew everything we could about Endale before he knew us.  

We started the adoption process.  There were heaps of paperwork and hoops to jump through to get to Endale.  It cost a lot of money that we didn't have.  We pursued him.  We did whatever it took to get to him.  

We wanted Endale.  Our agency told us that another family from Spain had committed to adopt him.  When they found out he had Down Syndrome, they decided not to adopt him.  The agency also went down their waiting family list to if anyone wanted to adopt him.  He had this "label" of Down Syndrome.  That didn't matter to us.  We wanted this child.  He was chosen.

 God's adoption story of us is so similar!

God knows us.  He knows everything about me...my quirks, my personality, the things I really don't like about myself, my struggles, my fears....and HE LOVES ME.

God pursues me.  He wants me.  He is there.  I don't have to go anywhere.  He had to sacrifice for me.  He did whatever it took to get ME.   HE GAVE HIS ONLY SON FOR ME.

God wants me.  I am really good at thinking of all the reasons someone wouldn't want to get to know me or want to spend time with me.  I can feel completely unworthy of love.  Or I think to myself, there is no way someone could love me.  God wanted me.  He wanted me with all my "issues", with all my failures and imperfections, He wanted me.  HE CHOSE ME.

His love is relentless.  His love doesn't give up.  His love doesn't keep records of my faults.  His love doesn't have boundaries.  His love won't give up on me.  His love is unstoppable. His love is for me.  His love can rescue me.  When I feel completely unlovable, His LOVE sets me free.

"There's no limit, no condition,

There's no boundary for His love

Nothing greater, nothing stronger

Nothing like the LOVE of God"

-Love Can-Central Live-

For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord. 

Romans 8:38-39 

NOTHING can separate us from His Love.

*If you don't know the love God has for you, please message me.  I would love to share with you the greatest love you will ever know.*

Dossier to China

This week our dossier was sent to China.  There were points in the last two months I thought this might never happen.  It is such a relief to know it's on the way!

From this point, we wait for it to be logged in, translated, and reviewed.  Once those steps are complete. China will officially "match" us with Levi and Lilly.  They will then issue a Letter of Approval (LOA).  It will be sent to us.  We will sign on the dotted line saying we want to join Lilly and Levi to our family!  This is a VERY important step.  Once the LOA is signed by us and sent back to China, they consider us Lilly and Levi's parents!

After sending back the LOA, a few more steps to follow.  We have to apply again with our children's names to the USCIS (United States Citizenship and Immigration Services) and wait for their approval to make Lilly and Levi U.S. citizens.  China waits for that approval from USCIS.  Once that is issued, they grant us travel approval (TA) to come to China and pick up our children.  We will request a Consulate Appointment and once we have one, we can book our tickets to our babies!

The adoption process has a lot of steps, but we're getting SO close.

Sign Commitment to Adopt Paperwork     2/8/15
Letter of Intent to China     2/9/15
Agency Application     2/13/15
Pre-Approval from China    2/28/15
Received Pre-approval for Levi 4/3/2015
Home Study Complete 4/6/2015
File I-800a with USCIS 4/2/2015
Receipt Date 4/22/2015
Fingerprint Appointment (Actual 5/18/2015-walked in 5/11/2015)
Receive I800a approval letter
Documents Authenticated
Dossier to China 7/15/15
Logged In Dossier in China
Letter of Action from China
File form I-800 to USCIS
I-800 approval from National Visa Center
Article 5 (Approval from US)
Travel Approval
Schedule Consulate Appt
Go to CHINA and get Lilly and Levi!!!!!

Please continue to pray for the Lilly and Levi as they wait for us to come.  One specific way you can pray is that China will grant our medical expedite.  After reviewing Lilly and Levi's files, our pediatrician was gracious to write a letter to China pleading with them to expedite their cases.  They both have heart issues that are common with Down Syndrome and it would be best if we could get them home as soon as possible to be checked out.  The doctor's letter accompanies our dossier.  It is up to China whether or not they see fit to expedite our adoptions.  If they do, we could travel earlier than anticipated!
 

You can also continue to pray for our funds.  God is so faithful and He has kept us tethered to Him in faith giving us just what we need for each next payment.  We've applied for several adoption grants.  Please pray that we might be granted assistance through some of these organizations.  If you're local, we'd love for you to come to our Pancake Breakfast, August 15.  All the details can be found HERE.

We also still have lots of envelopes to be adopted,  if you're interested in investing in the lives of Lilly and Levi.

God has blessed us over and over again.  He has provided in so many indescribable ways.  It is amazing to see His love for our children that we haven't even met yet.  Thank you each for your prayers and support in our journey.  

Our hearts long for Lilly and Levi.

Frequently Asked Questions and Comments

I thought I would take a moment and address some of the questions and comments that we have heard a lot since we shared that we are adopting again.  I wanted to respectfully share our feelings, and also gently combat a few of the negative things we've heard.

Why adopt?

Simply put, this is God's command.  He showed us how to love.  He has adopted us into His family through the death and resurrection of His Son and we are adopted.  James 1:27 says, "Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for the orphans and widows...".  Furthermore, we have given our lives to Christ.  We want to offer ourselves as living sacrifices for Him (Romans 12:1-2).  The world says buy more, get more, be the best, have the best.  That is not our desire.  Our desire is to live and breath our every breath for the glory of God our Savior.  So, when asked "why adopt?", I say "Why not?".

Why go to another country when so many kids need homes in America?

I understand why someone might ask this question.  God begin growing our hearts for children with Down Syndrome before we were married.   Our direct calling was children with Down Syndrome.  We know that in other countries children with special needs and specifically Down Syndrome are seen to have little or no value.  They are placed in institutions where many die from lack of nutrition and physical interaction. One blessing in America is that there is a Down Syndrome registry of families that has a waiting list of families ready to adopt children with Down Syndrome should a family feel the need to place them up for adoption.  Not as many families are willing to travel to other countries to give these precious babes forever families and their futures don't look as promising simply due to the country they were born in.  For us, distance is not an issue, after all Jesus came all the way from Heaven to Earth to rescue us.  (A side note to add, the Bible does not say care for the orphans only in America).

Have you thought about what your future will look like?

Of course, we've embraced what our future will look like.  We certainly did not go into adoption with any sort of naive thinking.  We have been praying for this for years.  I love that in our relationship, the two of us are on the same page.  Neither of us care about living in a giant house or having fancy things.  Simply put, we want to serve Christ with our all.  We are excited to know that God has called us for such a special purpose and that we have gotten a front row seat to watch His miraculous hand.  We get to see the Gospel lived out.  We get to see redemption right before our eyes.  We get to understand the Father's love for us better than we ever have before.

Where are you going to put them?  You don't have room in your house.
False.  We have room in our house.  It might not be a huge house and all of our kids won't have their own bedrooms, but we have room! We have been to Costa Rica, Ethiopia, Brazil, and Cuba and we have seen families living in one room huts without running water or even a door or window.  I would say we live in luxury compared to most of the world.  Will our children have to share a room?  Yes.  Is that a bad thing?  Absolutely not.  I pray that our children will learn to share and learn that they don't "need" their own room.  God has blessed our family and has always provided for us.  Everyone of our children will have their own bed to sleep in, a chair at the dinner table, the love of a family and better than all that....

they will know the Father's love for them.

How can you afford to adopt?

Does the financial aspect of raising $55,000 scare us?  Yes.  We live on a modest pastor's salary and we have always committed for Christy to stay at home with our children.  God has ALWAYS provided for our family.  We did not and do not have the money stashed away to pay for our adoption.  We knew that God was calling us to adopt.  We kept saying..."uh, but have you seen our bank account God?"  God reminded us that He's always been faithful through every journey.  He is all we need.  We are trusting Him every step of the way.  Do we know where the rest of the money will come from?  No, but we are trusting and believing in God's faithfulness.  I can tell you that we have had our minds blown over and over again throughout this process as God has proved His faithfulness.  

That's awesome, but we/I could never do that.

Actually, you could/can do this.  God is calling us to something bigger than ourselves.  This life is not about us contrary to what our culture shouts.  This life is to glorify God and honor Him with every breath He has given us.  What is God calling you to do that is out of your comfort zone?  It may not look like our calling, but He wants to use you!  May you have the faith to get out of the boat into the ocean and watch Him hold you up in the waves.

I don't like to read about your story, because 
it makes me feel bad like I'm not doing enough.

One thing we weren't prepared for was some of the harsh comments we've gotten.  We can't compare our unique calling with anyone else.  The calling on our family was to do ministry, plant a church and be a forever family to children with Down Syndrome.  Your calling is not necessarily going to look like ours and that's okay; however, plug into how and where God wants to use YOU!  Not everyone has agreed with us pursuing adoption.  Not everyone understands why we're adopting.  We're certainly not trying to "outdo" anyone.  We're trying to live ALL IN for Christ.  Period.  Ultimately, we are only trying to please our God.  He has given us all and we want to live all in for Him.  When the comments get icky, we have to keep our eyes on the One who called us out of the boat.  He is the ONLY One that will keep us from sinking.

He alone is my Rock and my salvation, 

my fortress where I will not be shaken.

My victory and honor come from God alone.
He is my refuge, a rock where no enemy can reach me.

O my people, trust in Him at all times.

Pour out your heart to Him,

for God is our refuge.

Psalm 62:6-8

*To God Be the Glory*

New Pictures from the Far East

We received some new pictures of our Lilly and Levi... here is a peek at two of them.

God's goodness

The main reason I wanted to have a blog was to have a place to share all God is doing through this adoption process.  There is one thing I know....when you do what God asks you to do, even when it seems impossible or scary, He is going to move in a mighty way.  Matt and I want God to be glorified in all that He is doing in our lives especially through this process. 

God has poured out His goodness on us this week.  In the last 5 days, God has done so many things to lift us up.  I could make a list of how He has done more than we could ever imagine in the last few days.  Some ways were small ways that had His fingerprints all over it.  He knows what we need.  Some have completely blown our minds.  I received a phone call yesterday morning that left me speechless due to tears of sheer awe and gratefulness. God knew the weight on my shoulders and I felt as if He physically lifted it off of me yesterday.  I don't understand why God would be so good to us, but I know it is HIM and only HIM.  Thank you God.

We took a huge step of faith when we said yes to adopt.  Then, we were called out even farther into the water when we said "yes" to TWO at one time.  We know this is not something we can do alone.  We got out of the comfortable boat, fixed our eyes on Jesus and He is carrying us.  Many people ask why we are doing what we're doing.  It's way beyond us.  We want to live with total abandon and serve Him faithfully until our last breath.  This is what God has purposed us for.  He has been so very good to us.  Sometimes I think about how many times in the past have I missed out on God's blessings, because I was too afraid to act on what He was calling me to do.  If God is gently nudging you to step out on faith and act, do it!  He wants to show you in a tangible way His mighty hand and shower His blessings on you.  Fix your eyes on Jesus and get out of that boat!

To God be the Glory

Against All Odds

Over the past few weeks I have been reading A Compassionate Call to Counter Culture by David Platt.  Normally it doesn’t take me this long to work through a book but with Counter Culture, every chapter is a heavy topic with pages full of thoughts and actions to digest.  Each chapter is a hotly debated cultural topic, and the first ones it tackles are poverty, abortion, and widows & orphans.     You would think, as we are going through the adoption process to bring two abandoned impoverished children into our family and our home that the two chapters that would hit home would be poverty and widows & orphans… and while both of those chapters lowered the boom and hit me right in the gut, the one that blew my mind was on abortion.

The chapter starts off with the stat that 42 Million Babies are aborted every year worldwide.  That is 115,000 babies every day.  (stats taken from abort73.com).  After 18 pages of thought provoking material, Platt concludes with a personal touch that hit home for me.

Here is what it said…

“As I bring this chapter to a close, I think about a mom who lives in one of those countries of the world where baby girls are not favorably looked upon.  Over thirty-five thousand children are ripped from their wombs every day in China, and over half of the women there have had at least one abortion. (allgirlsallowed.org/forced-abortion-statistics) Some of these abortions are voluntary; other are mandatory.  Government officials enforce abortion to ensure population control.  Women in rural villages are routinely checked to make sure they neither are pregnant nor have given birth recently.

I don’t know all the details about this particular mom, but I do know that when she became pregnant, she believed she was not able to take care of her child.  Yet she refused to have an abortion.  Instead, she brought her child to term and gave birth to a precious little girl on her own.

Then she took that newborn baby girl, wrapped her in a light-blue cloth, place her in a brown paper box, and in the middle of the night laid her in front of an orphanage for children with special needs.  The orphanage found this baby girl the next morning and conducted a search for her mother only to come up empty.

Though I don’t know who that mom is, I thank God for her.  Because of her courage to refuse abortion, and because of her compassion for the unborn, a little girl was able to live.  And every day when I come home from work, that little girl comes running up to me with a smile spread across her face, jumps into my arms, yells DADDY and gives me the biggest bear hug you can imagine.”  (Platt, pg 75)

As I read that all I could think was… we are waiting on paperwork and funds to go get two kids… a little girl with special needs and a little boy with special needs who had mothers who helped these kids make it to birth against unbelievable odds.  Then, realizing that they could not care for these kids, they found an orphanage that some day could adopt them out to a family that could give them a chance to live life.

Every day I look at Endale and thank God for him and the way God worked out all the details for that little boy to come to a home that loves him.  To come to a place that could experience his mood-changing smile.  To change the lives of so many people that he has met (AND THAT IS ONLY IN THE FIRST YEAR - what is in his future?)

As I look at him, I think of Lilly and Levi and the impact they are going to make all because God brought them, against all odds, to a family that loves them and excited to see how they will change their world.

It is an amazing process that all of us get to be a part of.  Thank you for supporting us in all of this and we ask for your continued prayers as God’s plan continue to unfold.

Double the Fun

We are so excited to share with you that we will be bringing TWO home from China!

When we started looking into the China adoption process, Matt and I talked about adopting more than one child.  There are a lot of children in China with Down Syndrome that need families.  Unfortunately, we didn't meet the financial requirements per person that China required.  Our agency made us aware that China typically issues a waiver for families that wish to adopt children with special needs.  So we proceeded with committing to adopt Lilly and China gave us our pre-approval (PA).  We begin looking at files of a couple more children in Lilly's orphanage.  There is also several boys that have Down Syndrome.  One in particular stole our heart.  We looked over his file for several weeks.  We prayed over him.  We asked God what He was telling us to do.

We didn't want to make an emotional decision.  We wanted to make sure that God was leading us.  Matt and I and our children all agreed that God wanted us to bring him home too.  We submitted the form to commit to adopt him and then we waited.  We had to wait for  China to give us the "okay"...the PA for this sweet boy we had already fallen in love with.

This morning, we received word that China granted us pre-approval to proceed to adopt this sweet boy!  So we will be bringing home TWO from China at the end of the year.  God is SO good.  Our family is SO excited.

Meet Levi Nan Jun

Levi means Joined by God