I thought I would take a moment and address some of the questions and comments that we have heard a lot since we shared that we are adopting again. I wanted to respectfully share our feelings, and also gently combat a few of the negative things we've heard.
Why adopt?
Simply put, this is God's command. He showed us how to love. He has adopted us into His family through the death and resurrection of His Son and we are adopted. James 1:27 says, "Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for the orphans and widows...". Furthermore, we have given our lives to Christ. We want to offer ourselves as living sacrifices for Him (Romans 12:1-2). The world says buy more, get more, be the best, have the best. That is not our desire. Our desire is to live and breath our every breath for the glory of God our Savior. So, when asked "why adopt?", I say "Why not?".
Why go to another country when so many kids need homes in America?
I understand why someone might ask this question. God begin growing our hearts for children with Down Syndrome before we were married. Our direct calling was children with Down Syndrome. We know that in other countries children with special needs and specifically Down Syndrome are seen to have little or no value. They are placed in institutions where many die from lack of nutrition and physical interaction. One blessing in America is that there is a Down Syndrome registry of families that has a waiting list of families ready to adopt children with Down Syndrome should a family feel the need to place them up for adoption. Not as many families are willing to travel to other countries to give these precious babes forever families and their futures don't look as promising simply due to the country they were born in. For us, distance is not an issue, after all Jesus came all the way from Heaven to Earth to rescue us. (A side note to add, the Bible does not say care for the orphans only in America).
Have you thought about what your future will look like?
Of course, we've embraced what our future will look like. We certainly did not go into adoption with any sort of naive thinking. We have been praying for this for years. I love that in our relationship, the two of us are on the same page. Neither of us care about living in a giant house or having fancy things. Simply put, we want to serve Christ with our all. We are excited to know that God has called us for such a special purpose and that we have gotten a front row seat to watch His miraculous hand. We get to see the Gospel lived out. We get to see redemption right before our eyes. We get to understand the Father's love for us better than we ever have before.
Where are you going to put them? You don't have room in your house.
False. We have room in our house. It might not be a huge house and all of our kids won't have their own bedrooms, but we have room! We have been to Costa Rica, Ethiopia, Brazil, and Cuba and we have seen families living in one room huts without running water or even a door or window. I would say we live in luxury compared to most of the world. Will our children have to share a room? Yes. Is that a bad thing? Absolutely not. I pray that our children will learn to share and learn that they don't "need" their own room. God has blessed our family and has always provided for us. Everyone of our children will have their own bed to sleep in, a chair at the dinner table, the love of a family and better than all that....
False. We have room in our house. It might not be a huge house and all of our kids won't have their own bedrooms, but we have room! We have been to Costa Rica, Ethiopia, Brazil, and Cuba and we have seen families living in one room huts without running water or even a door or window. I would say we live in luxury compared to most of the world. Will our children have to share a room? Yes. Is that a bad thing? Absolutely not. I pray that our children will learn to share and learn that they don't "need" their own room. God has blessed our family and has always provided for us. Everyone of our children will have their own bed to sleep in, a chair at the dinner table, the love of a family and better than all that....
they will know the Father's love for them.
How can you afford to adopt?
Does the financial aspect of raising $55,000 scare us? Yes. We live on a modest pastor's salary and we have always committed for Christy to stay at home with our children. God has ALWAYS provided for our family. We did not and do not have the money stashed away to pay for our adoption. We knew that God was calling us to adopt. We kept saying..."uh, but have you seen our bank account God?" God reminded us that He's always been faithful through every journey. He is all we need. We are trusting Him every step of the way. Do we know where the rest of the money will come from? No, but we are trusting and believing in God's faithfulness. I can tell you that we have had our minds blown over and over again throughout this process as God has proved His faithfulness.
That's awesome, but we/I could never do that.
Actually, you could/can do this. God is calling us to something bigger than ourselves. This life is not about us contrary to what our culture shouts. This life is to glorify God and honor Him with every breath He has given us. What is God calling you to do that is out of your comfort zone? It may not look like our calling, but He wants to use you! May you have the faith to get out of the boat into the ocean and watch Him hold you up in the waves.
I don't like to read about your story, because
it makes me feel bad like I'm not doing enough.
it makes me feel bad like I'm not doing enough.
One thing we weren't prepared for was some of the harsh comments we've gotten. We can't compare our unique calling with anyone else. The calling on our family was to do ministry, plant a church and be a forever family to children with Down Syndrome. Your calling is not necessarily going to look like ours and that's okay; however, plug into how and where God wants to use YOU! Not everyone has agreed with us pursuing adoption. Not everyone understands why we're adopting. We're certainly not trying to "outdo" anyone. We're trying to live ALL IN for Christ. Period. Ultimately, we are only trying to please our God. He has given us all and we want to live all in for Him. When the comments get icky, we have to keep our eyes on the One who called us out of the boat. He is the ONLY One that will keep us from sinking.
He alone is my Rock and my salvation,
my fortress where I will not be shaken.
My victory and honor come from God alone.
He is my refuge, a rock where no enemy can reach me.
He is my refuge, a rock where no enemy can reach me.
O my people, trust in Him at all times.
Pour out your heart to Him,
for God is our refuge.
Psalm 62:6-8
*To God Be the Glory*
